WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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