smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Randomize