i don't like sucking hair
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
