wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
