with your own penis?
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Welp...herpes.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
