? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize