i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize