in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
