And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Randomize
