I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
