I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize