You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
