just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize
