Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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