Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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