the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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