tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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