never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
