So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
