I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
