The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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