Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
