you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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