That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Randomize
