i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
