Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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