Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
