we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I think your dad took our porno
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize