I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
