youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
