i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
