WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
