Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
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