I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
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