She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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