yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Randomize
