after a month anything with tits is on the radar
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
