True but thats because hes a fetus.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
