Tell her she can't have a vagina
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
