I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
it wasn't lemon gatorade
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Randomize
