look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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