I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
