is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Randomize
