I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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