Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
