so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
