it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
