Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
my poor anus
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
