I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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