worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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