Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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